Day 33, Wednesday 17th of December 2014

Dear Diary
I woke up quite early today, well early for me. Unfortunately that distant translate into my getting up time, about an hour and a bit later, as opposed to the usual half an hour. Once I got up I dressed and brushed my hair. The breakfast, and this time I even remembered my lunch. And my chocolate. Technically it wasn’t mine ever since Master told me to give it to someone else. But it was a popping candy one, second best only to the one with strawberry in the middle. At least it wasn’t one of those. As I was packing my lunch box, Benjamin threw his in the bin. In the bin. A chocolate, in the bin.
Weren’t you going to ask if anyone wanted it?
No? You can have it if you want, I don’t like those ones.
Does it still have the wrapper on it?
I got I out of the bin and washed it off. Someone had put paper in the wrong one, so it didn’t even have anything icky on it. Still, better safe than sorry. It seems like I’ll get a chocolate after all. Mum drove me and Benjamin to the primary school for the lil’kids (that’s what I call Catherine and Benjamin, they’ll always be little to me no matter how grown up they get) final assembly. Grandma hands me her phone, and I video the whole thing. Catherine gets a few awards, and Benjamin won the chess championship. After the assembely I find my old (as in past) Italian teacher. Apparently she knew Ms MacDonald, and I talked with her about DuoLingo and how well I was doing in Italian. Mum got talking to Mr Griffiths (the Deputy Principal of my school and a guest speaker at the assembely). We talked for ages and then Mum called me over. She said Mr Griffiths had offered to take me to school and get me signed in. It would save mum the extra journey and time, and he was going there anyway. Still I was edgy, mum might be on the board and see Mr Griffiths every Wednesday and at every parent meeting and know him far better than me. But childhood warnings of “stranger danger” and don’t get into a man’s car, especially if he offers you a lolly. I know Mr Griffiths about as well as I know the Lollypop Man, but I certainly wouldn’t hop in a car with him. I cracked a small, half-hearted joke about him offering me a lolly, but it still didn’t set me at rest. To refuse, well I had no idea how to without being rude, and to accept scared me. I eventually decided to go, after all, Mum trusted him, and I trusted Mum. We walked down past some streets to his car, and just as it started getting unfamiliar we found it. His car was a nice, brand new, immaculately cleaned sort of one. It wasn’t homey like our car, it was stiff despite the leather seats, and a pretentious sort of car ( I actually don’t know what pretentious means but I t sounds fitting). We drove straight to the school, deviating only slightly from Mum’s usual route. We made light talk the whole way, and I slipped into what I affectionately call Princess Mode. I was careful with my movements making them seem graceful and princess like. I crossed my legs, placed my hands neatly on my lap, and acted like I had a pile of book on top of my head. I tend to do this when I’m nervous, unsure of how to act, or want to impress. Today I was definitely the first two. I signed In and only just got to 3rd period on time. I missed recess. And a chance to give someone the chocolate, I’ll have to find someone at lunch. It was Science, Jacob wanted to know where I’d been for English and Photography. I told him at my younger siblings’ assembly. We cut out some palm cards which I have to rehearse tonight, and I told him that I sent some images to his email for the PowerPoint. I just hope technology doesn’t crash on us tomorrow. After science I had Maths. No-one really did any work, and most played Heads down Thumbs up, then Celebrity Heads. One guy got Hitler, and another got Ken (from Barbie) then another one was Nicky Minage. A girl also got Crocodile Dundee, she had a terrible time guessing it. I barely got a page of work done because I was watching them. After Maths I went to the Library, and ate my lunch. Then my recess. Then I looked at the two chocolates, then the two Librarians, then back at the chocolates, librarians. They had put up with more overdue books and I’ve even damaged one (I swear I had no idea there was water on that bench). If anyone was more deserving than me, it was them. But I couldn’t give only one a chocolate, or break it in half for both of them. Two chocolates, two librarians. No chocolate for me. Hiding my long face behind a memory of a smile I presented both of them with their “Christmas gift”. Now the smile I had was real, giving is far more filling than chocolate. Plus it also probably helped that I remembered lunch. I really need to stop that forgetting lunch thing too, I read in a news article the other day that if you stop eating your body goes into “Famine mode” and starts saving up every little scrap of energy it can get and turns it into fat. So it doesn’t even have any side benefits anyway. I go off in search of new books. I’ve now got an allowance of 4 more so that’s enough for half a series (unless it’s a long one). Ruby joins me, also looking for more books, and together we go on a book search. I find the Nicholas Flamel series, one I that I’d started reading, about 2 or three years ago. Then I caught up with the author and had to wait a year for the next book. I forgot about it, and now I’m here with the next four books in my arms. I just hope I can remember the character’s names. I recommend the Last Thirteen to Ruby and we head to the counter. I don’t hold up the line that much this time. Much. The bell goes and there’s an announcement on the PA about the year 10 assembely. I don’t catch all of it, but I know from two years past to head to the Curtin Theatre. I’m right, and I follow the line to a seat. To my dismay, I get a seat right behind two boys who had just reapplied deodorant. The over-floury (it literally smells like plain flour) smell that they seem to think girls like. I wrinkle my nose and hope I can tolerate it. A soft touch of it would have been ok, but not when they spray the entire body with the stuff. I notice the lack of year 10’s and seeing my way out I go and ask Ms Fraser if I’m in the right assembly. She says yes, and I go sit down, this time in a far better spot of my own choosing.the assembly drags on, and I resist falling asleep. There’s a. Little game I play as assembelies, pick the strangest name from the winners of the awards. Today the imaginary prize went to Shan-e-a golden-spiel. The cruelties of parents, they could’ve at least chosen the parent with the less dog-like last name, or a more easy to spell first name. She won some, maths competition. After the assembly we used the last half hour of S+E to watch Surf’s Up. I got a bit scared when Cody got wiped out on the reef, seeing the big waves. The half a second before it crashes, the desperate need for air. Bad memories. I wince even now, though I didn’t get knocked out like Cody did on the reef. Getting dumped is not fun. Aside from that, the friendship and “never give up” message made the movie a pretty good one. After school I lugged my school bag home. I stopped at the park in an attempt to climb a well-worn tree with zero footholds, and get a drink. Then at the Mulberry Tree (there’s no mulberries anymore 😦 ). I get home and collapse on my bed. Homework, check iPhone or book? Then Mum called and I helped out with jobs a bit, before checking for messages. The Skype message confused me until I checked the Snapchat one. He thought my last day was today. In asking me to do a photo for him before I went to school, he reminded me that it was tomorrow. Well of course it’s tomorrow, but his reminder made it seem sooner. As opposed to a long dreamed of/dreaded day. Did I dread the possible embarrassment? Or maybe the risk of getting caught? But those things made me exited too. Excitement and dread, arousement and fear. Two sides of the same coins, and now it feels like they’re being flipped. Over and over again, bouncing against my stomach walls. And tickling my lower regions already. What would be worse? The anticipation? Or not being allowed to touch myself tomorrow (I hope that doesn’t include the night) I guess I’ll find out. I head off to Benjamin’s sailing thing, and I find out that we are going on a boat too, not just Benjamin. It’s far better than just sitting on the beach. All was going well, until the Santa-boat threw their lollies at us. This made Michelle (a skipper with about as much experience as me) lose her concentration and we ran into the sand bank. It took us ages to get out, and we had to practically tip the boat sideways to do it. I got a bit scared because I had nothing else to do and no-one told me what was going on until after. We went home earlier than I thought, and I texted Master that I was home immediately. I waited for a reply message, on either apps, but none got through/were sent. I wonder if Master was busy planning for tomorrow night or if he was doing work. I tried to come up with some ideas that Master might be thinking of the fuel a new fantasy. But came up blank. I turned to a website I had found a short while ago Remittance Girl, and started exploring her new stories. There’s something captivating about them, she’s a good writer, but I like her short stories the best. She gives you the senses rather than just sight, and the 4 others, but feelings as well. Benjamin came in saying it was late. I quickly pushed the sleep button so he wouldn’t see. I turned my light off and took my Goodnight Photo, then sent my goodnight message. I started my blog and began to type.
Goodnight Master.
Float on the drifting dreams of the Sandman.


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